Sunday, April 12, 2009

Confusion and Mishaps

That's five times i've woken up with nightmares and the worst of headaches. But this time things are different, I am coherent and...the vibes in the room are changing around me.

"Natalie, are you alright?" It was that beautiful man again...uh what's his name?

He sighed, then replied, "Edward" and he smiled--he probably heard the beautiful part too. He seems to be more comfortable with me more so than the others. After all he was the one who found me. Yet, I still feel alienated.

"I should go," I whispered as the feeling of hate crept in my mind. "I truly do not mean to be insulting but I don't belong here! I don't even know why you took me here, I'm fine on my own." The truth was inevitable, I wasn't fine because the expression on my face and just the way i stood there was a given.

"Thank you," I whispered as tears rolled down my shivering face. I headed toward the door. Then I heard them say "No Jacob!" and before I knew it, i was pinned to the couch. I looked forward to see beady brown eyes grazing my face like I were the enemy. Pinned to the cushions, I remained completely still after noticing is was unharmed. I looked into his eyes and it was that moment again, like the Earth stood still. It was a solid bond, like an automatic connection. I didn't quite understand how someone I don't know at all could have such an impact.

"You can't leave," he breathed, then he whispered in my ear, "did you feel that? I need to take care of you, my life is dedicated to you now." I was scared but not confused this seemed so natural for some reason and I could feel myself slipping away from consciousness.

***
Jasper put her out again, the Cullens have pride issues. Bloodsuckers are damn wimps, thinking i would hurt her; as if I were that stupid and careless. Being unable to control myself and my emotions sure does make me feel stupid and careless enough. So far, my experience with Forks has just worsened my cause. Hanging around vamps all day won't prevent me from turning into a wolf. Since I lost Bella, I feel as though the wolf in me is all I have left. To escape the stress, the reminders, I need to run free.
I won't let them take all of me.

....